Yesterday as I prepped for my evening class, created a brochure for the exciting upcoming “worldwide” 2018 Detox (hope you will join me for the transformational journey), drove cookies over to my son’s college for their end of semester study break surprise, enjoyed time with my daughter as we drove to and from school, developed a flyer for upcoming workshops and plugged away on the next book, I did find a few breathing moments to reflect deeper on APE = Attachments, Perceptions, Expectations. (Yep, all one sentence, separated by commas – a reflection of our “busy” to-do life!)
As humans we sure seem to complicate things. While we say and think we are “advancing” things, I have many days that I do not agree with that. Like most things, I think there is a pretty long pro – con list. Everyone is soooooo busy, yet I am not sure I experience more happiness. So, what are we busy doing? Why? If we are not happy doing and have no time to enjoy after the doing, what perpetual cycle are we exactly saying yes to? I hear things like:
- “Tomorrow I’ll have fun”
- “In the future I won’t have to work so hard..”
- “When I retire I’ll..”
- “As soon as the weekend comes…”
- “Next year I’m going to…”
Well it is tomorrow already, and the next moment is the future, and you want to wait until you retire to enjoy life?? Yeah!! I am not to sure we have advanced. On the other hand it is darn cool that:
- Someone around the world that I do not know reads the words I put upon this page.
- That in January I get to share a transformational journey with anyone who wants to start the new year with an incredible DETOX!!
- I can get very quick gratification through communicating with friends and family in other parts of the world.
- It is awesome that I can connect with my sister in Mongolia through the airwaves via phone and not have a huge phone bill (I remember those long distance phone bills!!).
However, my truth, I would prefer to actually share time with all of these people in person. Engaging in a real human connection and experience. I treasure such authentic presence! The times when in person we co-create a memory that I carry in my heart, mind and soul. Some emails have words that touch me, I carry them in my heart – but, they do not have the same quality, intensity, or real life texture.
All of our Attachments, Perceptions, and Expectations seem to wrap themselves around one root “cause” – what do we personally want to experience, which means FEEL. Yep, us silly humans are driven by our feelings, whether we want to admit it or not. We desire “success” for what? Well, let’s see, feeling pride and accomplishment feels pretty darn good. Then there is the freedom felt when all the bills are paid, food is in the fridge. Falling and being in love definitely feels good, just ask a couple how they met and watch their faces light up with the memory. Laughing and sharing time with friends and family fills up our little hearts, we smile right now when we stop to remember.
Try it! Think about something you like to do. Pull up in your mind, something you wish you had or were doing. Recall a recent experience that you really enjoyed. When you dig into them, what really sits at the core? It is the “feeling” you get from doing it, having it, sharing it, etc… Our little human engine is driven by our sensory desires – what we want to feel!! It really is that simple.
So one of the things that confuses me, is why do I observe so many people choosing to live in a negative feeling? I don’t understand?!? If you stopped right now in your tracks, closed your eyes and remembered an experience or time in your life that you felt really good, I bet you would start to smile, despite yourself. There’s proof, we can choose to feel good!! That takes me to the beginning of this paragraph, why do we choose to feel bad? Not only that, we like sharing that “feeling” with others, hoping they will join us on the “Life is tough band wagon”, the “Whoa is me…”.
Please do not get me wrong, life does “happen” – sad things occur. Painful situations arise. Loss happens. Feel it! Be in it! They are true human feelings we are blessed to experience. Be authentic and real in it, this does not pull people down with you, it allows them to truly share with you. There is a difference between being a chosen “victim” in our life, to “being in and sharing our true feelings”. The victim tries to get people to cheer along in misery, the other allows and invites people to share life – for me there is a BIG difference. Sign me up, for the latter please, for I love sharing the dance of life with you!!
The bottom line to today’s little meandering blog – “What We Desire”, is to understand and accept that we are driven by what we want to FEEL! That’s it, again it is quite simple. The often forgotten aspect of this truth is that we are at CHOICE to what we want to FEEL! (TIP and APE are just excuses, so….!!) (TIP=Take It Personal)
A.C.T. (always choose truth – your inner truth) with authenticity today, be true to your “feeling” desires and choose how you want to feel no matter what comes at you.