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It Did Work Out…

Latest Raw Authentic Musing

Click on Image at the bottom of blog for the continued adventure with Rita, Francine and the miraculous magazine. Who might find one next? How is it changing life’s? What is happening for Rita and Francine as they open and feel?

What dreams await your curious exploration? Don’t let them die within you….
  • I am curious, have you ever done something you thought was silly, yet you just had to do it? Your mind would not shut up until you did it?
  • Moved somewhere because the place would not stop haunting you?
  • Ever dreamed of experiencing something, thoughts of it flowing into your mind without invite?
  • Wanted to try another job or place – but let fear control you?

My time on San Juan Island, Washington at the polycultural farm was one such experience. I continue to be so grateful for that time and all I learned. Since my return to Boise, Idaho I have had many people say, “I’m so sorry it didn’t work out.” My response to this caring statement is “It did work out, perfectly.”

If we allow our soul to speak, it has such adventures, dreams and desires to share…

When did we learn to view our life through the lens of “Success or Failure?” Is not life an adventure full of twists, turns, spins, ups and downs? If I was always happy and satisfied, how would I know, if I did not have relevancy by feeling otherwise. If I saw everything I tried that I did not like or enjoy as a failure, would I not be teaching myself shame and fear?

How do we know, if we do not try?

When your child begins to walk and falls down, do you tell them they are a failure? When a friend embarks on a new relationship, do you tell them not to do it because it might not “work out?” When did we become so judgmental and afraid to try? We definitely were not born that way.

Why would anyone ever extinguish the mystery of life unfolding and becoming…..

Today I sit here smiling at another opportunity I am preparing to experience. I am excited and open to all it shall offer me. I have no idea if I will love it or not. If it will be right for me or not. What a thrill to go for it and try!!

As I shared in my last blog, I received the unexpected news that I get to move from the lovely pond sanctuary, opening the space back up for the family who owns it. The last few years have found me craving a small simple space where I walk or bike everywhere. A place that is easy to care for, thus giving me more time to write and pursue other things I find pleasure in.

I joyously get to move to such a space this next week – embarking on my next adventure in this life. Will I enjoy it or not? I don’t know. What I do know is that I will not know unless I try.

The space is teeny tiny (approximately 200 sq ft), full of charm, close to everything and perfect for this Writer to explore more.

We are here but a moment in time ~ why would we choose to limit the journey…?

When I visit with people asking about their passions, desires, wishes and dreams – I am often met with a surprised blank look. The words, “I don’t know,” often follow. Or, “I’ve never thought about it.”

I wonder, if we took away the judgment, comparison and shame, would more people go for it? Is not life about enjoying the journey? Being in the moments we never get back? Enjoying the sensations such an experience offer us?

Personally, I prefer to view my life as “It is always working out for me.” When I look back in the rearview mirror of my life, I smile, for it is miraculous how all the experiences are dots on a road map of this grand adventure. Each one could not exist without the one before it. Was it all fun? No. However, I would not trade any of it, for I would not be me, here today celebrating life’s next unfolding – I know it is working out for me.

This blog entry is an invitation.

  • Dream…
  • Explore…
  • Feel the inspired callings…
  • Let go of fear…
  • Leap with trust and love…
  • Go For it…
  • Live a life of NO regrets…
  • Carpe Diem…
  • All that is certain is uncertainty – thus the now moment is precious…
If you have been following Rita, Francine and the miracle magazine – click the image above.
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Unexpected News Generates Creativity and Adaptation…

The Beingness Project – Your Personal Journey Home – A novel invitation to remember who YOU are… Click on the title above to continue the journey with Rita, explore with her as she remembers what brings her joy. Meet Francine who begins to question what happiness truly is….

Take a peek at Today’s Raw Musings

The tide of life rolls in and out consistently, it never does so the same as yesterday or as it will tomorrow. Humanity mimics such grand diversity, expressing and unfolding ever on…

Yesterday I received some unexpected news that has stirred all kinds of emotions. First, I experienced the fear jolt when life presents something that means you must make a change. Then, after a few deep breaths of acceptance, I rolled into gratitude and faith. Life is inviting me into what comes next. Is the timing ideal, No. Do I know where I will go, No. Have I figured out how I shall make this move, No.

In quiet surrender we get to explore the unfolding of life’s adventure, our soul’s invitation into what comes next…

What I do know –

  • I am healthy, willing, creative and believe that life always works out.
  • My children are safe, well and joyfully on their path.
  • I have amazing friends and family.
  • I have experienced throughout life that things happen for a reason and sometimes we just get to be patient with trust.
  • I have joyously been simplifying my life and belongings for years now, so it is easier to adapt to life’s unexpected.
  • Life moves along with or without us, so I can choose to delight in the unknown or live in fear and worry. The latter is not fun or fulfilling.
  • I am a happy, strong soul that chooses to see life as a grand adventure, so this is an opportunity, an introduction into what comes next…

Now please know, I have my moments when I do feel the concern surface. When it does I notice it, accept it and then think about the real truth – I am okay and everything always works out.

So, what is this unexpected news? In a quick nutshell I must find a new place to live in 11 days. I sadly must leave the miraculous home I have been blessed to reside in for over four years. This space has been a gift beyond any words I can begin to express upon the page. I am truly excited that one of the owning family members is returning home. It will be very sweet for this beautiful home to wrap its arms around original family members again. My heart is joyous and overflowing with gratitude.

Personally as I continue to write, create and work towards a passionate life in full expression of my life calling, I move towards financial freedom one day at a time. It is definitely a work in progress, thus, I get to be creative with what I have and don’t presently have.

I joked with both my children that I am happy to live in a tent, my car, a simple hobbit hut, for all I wish to do is write. Period. All I dream of doing is putting word to page, weaving stories for others to feel and experience. Now that my children are off on their own exploratory adventures, I find myself in such a glorious new phase of life. I have always been a quiet soul who enjoys the simple grace that flows. For years now I have craved to live in a small cabin where I quietly write and soak in natures balm. Or, if in the city a delightful small studio space with many windows where I watch and observe life, gathering even more inspiration for the words that flow.

This unexpected news is good news. I can feel it. Within my heart and soul I can feel that it is time for me to move into what comes next. I do not know what, where or how. I choose to surrender with love, gratitude and inner knowing that the perfect answer is aligning itself.

Life as I presently know it is about to shift. In less than two weeks I shall find myself adapting to what is next. I smile at this thought, for it is a mystery in process of writing itself. I enjoy my precious last days in this glorious sanctuary, reflecting on the memories and gracious gifts bestowed upon my heart and soul during my time here.

I ask you with curiosity –
  • When did life throw you a curve ball that led to amazing new experiences?
  • When you look at your life, how often have you been surprised by how it plays out?
  • Do you choose to see change as a scary unknown or a curious adventure?

Carpe Diem!! Ready or not, here I come…

There are more stars than I can count, there are more paths to explore than I can in one lifetime ~ they all twinkle, invite, teach, imprinting themselves upon my very soul…
Click on the image below to read the in process novel – new excerpts are shared Monday, Wednesday and Friday at The Beingness Project.
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We Cannot Know….

If you are following the fictional journey, meet Francine today – Click Here

If you follow my unedited raw musings, click here for yesterdays.

I experience that most people believe they know, know another, know why a person acts this way or that, know what causes someone to do something, know why they feel a certain way, know… However, we cannot know.

Even when it is our children, parents, family or close friends, we cannot know. The journey of each single human being is unique. How we experience life, interpret what happens, react and live is completely individualistic.

Why then do we spend so much time trying to persuade another to think like we do? Convince them of living a certain way? Doing things the way we want?

What would the world be like if we accepted, valued and honored each individual for exactly who they are? Allowing them to BE, free of judgment and coercion.

I chuckle at this thought, for I am not sure we can do it. It seems to be an intrinsic behavior to seek like minded souls and if we don’t find them to try hard to make someone become more like us.

I freely admit I am very guilty of this behavior. Passionately so in my early twenties, I was eager to convince all who would listen that we should eat healthy, exercise, care about the environment, etc…. Of course I still have my strong personal feelings about life, how I prefer to live, what I like to do and to whom I like to share time with. However, I have come to understand that I cannot know, ever.

I find this to be wonderful, for it means I will always get to hear a different story. Learn something new. Look at something from a different perspective. It keeps the world interesting. It also means I get to be ME, freely with delight.

Freedom resides in loving ourselves right here, right now…

I invite you to play with this idea –

  • Ask a sibling or friend to share about an experience you both participated in – notice the differences and similarities.
  • Talk with a colleague about something you both attended, same time and place – did they experience the same things?
  • Explore memories with your partner/spouse, friend, children…?

It can be eye opening to learn how differently we each experience the world. We can never KNOW what another feels or experiences.

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Why Do We Watch or Read…?

For those following Rita’s awakening click here – Excerpt 5

Do you have that favorite movie you have watched over and over and over again? What about a TV series that you still smile about, even though you watched it years ago? Are there movies and shows that you secretly watch only when you are alone, never telling someone because they might think you are silly, too romantic, or crazy? Is there a book that you have read over and over again? Perhaps it is a book you bought a copy for all your friends, cause everyone will love it like you do, right?

I can honestly answer yes to all of the above. What is it that makes us come back to a movie? Nostalgically remember a show? Keep a book on our shelf forever?

In the pages I get to exist outside myself, I get to feel, explore and be.
Sometimes it is what I dream of, others shock me, while still others ignite such passion….

It is the feelings we get when we watch or read. They give us opportunity to vicariously experience something, give us hope, help us to believe. Some offer us laughter. Others inspire, help us to not feel alone, ignite passion, or simply let us be for awhile. Sometimes it may not be the show as much as who we watch it with, a sweet memory forever etched in our heart.

We choose to watch for many reasons, however, those reasons are tied to an emotion – whether you want to admit it or not.

Many people will say, “I want to escape,” “disappear for awhile,” “forget everything for a bit.” I completely own and admit this reason for disappearing into the world of a movie, show or book. It is delightful to live through the characters, leaving my life behind to feel, dream and imagine.

For most of my life I have written only nonfiction, which my library reflects as my chosen genre. While I enjoy reading a great fiction novel, they seem to be more rare and less often. During my furlough time with COVID I was called to the page in a new way. It caught me off guard and yet I allowed my muse free rein. I began the fiction novel I now share excerpts from three days of the week. Taking my reader on a journey through the life’s of the characters.

I come to the page with anticipation, what will I learn, see, feel, touch, taste, hear…??

I am having so much fun in my writers imaginary world. I now have so many questions for the authors of fiction – how do you leave your characters, how do you come back into the “real world”, how do you keep it all straight while residing in two worlds???

Like watching a good movie I get to disappear for as long as my body will acquiesce to sitting in one place. I get to imagine how it would feel, letting the plot surprise me as it presents itself. I find myself desperately wanting to hide away, to run to a remote little cabin where I can write uninterrupted until the pen is satisfied and complete. I visualize the day when I will not wedge my writing into a forty hour work week.

Already I feel other story ideas generating, bubbling to the surface. I joyfully watch them percolate, knowing their time for birthing shall arrive in perfection as it always does. Right now I get to enjoy every moment I am graced to play with the characters of The Beingness Project – Your Personal Journey Home. They have become a part of my family. I excitedly await the new people I get to meet when they show up unexpected. Oh what fun it is to feel and be in this other existence, a true “fly on the wall” in another time and space.

I invite you to join us as the story unfolds. Today’s excerpt – Day 5 . Will Rita tell her best friend? Will her children wonder what is happening?

I welcome your thoughts, input, and as I have shared constructive noticing when I make a mistake, for I am not an editor, I’m a free flowing writer, who lets the words run wild.

In conclusion, I ask again –

  • Why do you watch and read again?
  • What are we craving and desiring when we revisit a movie, book, show?
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Nurturing My Muse…

My 9 to 5 job that presently keeps me fed and cared for is an intense social job. Between colleagues and clients there is no true introvert quiet. While I may not be perceived as an introvert, I truly am, through and through. I fill up my cup and come back to life when I get to be by myself. The only company I seek or wish to nurture is my muse. He is always welcome, for he awakens and fulfills my innermost desires.

This mornings RAW musings. To read in full click here….

Yesterday after a full week of juggling my day job with my love and passion to come to the page, I was tapped. My muse and soul pleaded for quiet. They literally screamed for pure divine solitude. So, I listened, nurturing the muse, soothing the soul and gifting the body and mind with freedom to rest while wondering into philosophical caverns.

Filling up my muse’s cup, I explored and wandered with other writers, who like me ached for solitude…

Today I arise. My muse is such grand company. Stirring within me such pleasure, passion, joy and excitement for life’s grand adventure. Oh how I love to play with my muse, he puts the sparkle into life, inspires me to yield, let go and unabashedly play.

Thanks to my muse I do not give up. I step forth with pure trust that he shall guide me home to the writer’s life, to freedom, to a time when he and I get to play all day if we so choose. No time clocks, no outside work, just he and I co-creating with wild abandon.

I feel strongly that we all have a muse, a calling, a beckoning to come home. Delightfully, our muse’s are unique, diversified as we are. When we nurture our muse, hear them, let them take over and fill us up, the sensation is like no other. Infinite joy, wild passion, soft exploration, sweet discovery… There truly are no words to describe such union.

Freedom lies within our surrender, it awaits release, invitation, presence…

I have also discovered that my muse is not just one dimensional. I feel him weave with me whenever I allow myself to be completely present and enraptured with life. Fully allowing myself to feel, taste, touch, hear and smell the limitless sensations of life’s emotional treasure box.

Once one has drank the rich syrup from the cup offered by their muse, there is no turning back, the taste lingers, it haunts you, whispering an invitation to come home. Oh, once you dance unabashedly with your muse, their is no other partner who can enrapture you so… His bite has infested you, there is no cure. Nor, will you wish for a cure.

When we live each day married to our muse we are like a beacon in the dark, seen by others as we learn to see. I cannot imagine life without my muse. To shackle him is to stop my breath. To imprison him, is to clench my heart into stillness.

Why have we been taught to tame our muse, gag him, place him in bondage behind the walls of societal etiquette and expectation? Set him free, release the bonds, remove the gag ~ for only then are you free….

Do not fear my dear muse, I shall always nurture you. In me, you are home. In you, I am alive and home. As we dance together the world awakens with wonder. I hope that more dancers shall join us, filling the galaxy with impassioned, vibrant beings who are enraptured with life’s grand adventure.

  • I am curious, how do you and your muse express?
  • Share with the world?
  • Do you nurture and invite the well being of your muse?
  • Or turn them away, fearful of their intensity and passion?

Click on the image below to enjoy how my muse and I play with a fictional journey into “What if” ~ Travel with the characters as they reunite with their muse, awakening a passionate life…

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What Fills You With Joy…?

In the United States one of the first questions people ask another when they meet is “What do you do?” or “Where do you work?”. From the response we begin a litany of judgments within our head, cornering this person into what we perceive someone will be like if they are a teacher, accountant, pilot, engineer, server, nanny, CEO, director, singer, etc… Did you notice your reaction to each title? It is entertaining to observe how programed we are.

When I am working with clients I like to ask, “Do you have anything fun planned for the rest of your day?” or “What do you like to do?” It is fun to watch them react to such an unexpected question. I personally don’t want to know what you DO. I want to know what fills you with JOY. What puts a smile on your face, a dance in your step and fills your life with sweet memories.

To dance, is to embody the joy that internally vibrates from within…

As I continue to write “The BEingness Project” (today’s excerpt) novel, I’m having a delightful time allowing the characters to share their truth about what brings them happiness, fills them with excitement, passion, desire… I do not pretend to know or predict, I truly let them present to me as the words flow onto the page. What a joyous play date – a double dose of joy – I get to write, my innermost love and I get to learn about a new person.

As a child we naturally gravitate to what delights and entertains our innermost desires and wants. Then “growing up” and “adult training” ensue, deflating our essential intrinsic path to joy. I have always wondered why we bought into such a contrived way of living.

I invite you to join us as we explore and learn with our characters how to find our way back to the inner joy that has been waiting patiently for our remembering. Each person is a unique experience and unfolding… Below is the novel from this weeks journey. Click the image below to read how Rita is re-discovering what brings her JOY… Will her secret get discovered?

What brings you JOY? What do are you passionate about? What gets you out of bed in excitement and anticipation?

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Stories Unite Us…

Join us for a story about awakening the heart’s desire, the soul’s dream. (go to page 3 if you have been reading along)

Stories, we all love stories. When I was a junior high English teacher I was keenly reminded how important stories are in connecting us to one another. They gift us with this little glimpse into someone’s life, make us laugh, cry, imagine, etc… Each of my classes coveted “Storytime,” it united us in our own special way, with each class being unique, due to the individuals in the room.

When you glance upon your life, the stories lift off the page to tell a tale of your becoming and BEing…

As you travel around this ball in the sky called earth, dropping in at different locations, there is always a story. There is the historical story, the present day, the future hopes and dreams. Stories unite us, inspire us, allow us to feel and connect to parts of ourselves we sometimes close off. In today’s world of modern technology stories come at us through many streams – Instagram, YouTube, Snapchat, movies, television, books, blogs, the list goes on…

I am having so much fun sharing my fictional book! At the same time it is somewhat scary, for the self critique inside wants to come out to judge. However, as the characters become a part of my everyday life, I cannot leave them in the dark, for I do believe that they have a story to share. It has made my heart happy to hear from readers that they relate to Rita, that this first character is connecting to them and they are curious for more.

Can Rita keep the life changing experience to herself? Will she get caught? It’s totally unbelievable and crazy, yet, she can’t deny her desire for more…

What new worlds lie in wait for you? The invitation to your life awaits your reply…

Join us at “The Beingness Project – A Fictional Invitation,” to be reminded that life is a journey, a story in process, each day a gift to unwrap and open. The link above will take you directly to page 3, so if you are just joining us, make sure to scroll to the bottom of the page to select page 1 to start the journey with Rita. Share this book with a friend, it will give you a fun opportunity to explore some deep topics. A new page is presented every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

As I stretch myself into vulnerable sharing, there is also the “BEingness Musings,” here again there are new posts three times a week, Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Go to the bottom of the page to select the piece you wish to read. The musings are unedited “art pieces” that flow from within me through my fountain pen unto the page. I share the image of the writing for those of you who enjoy reading the original ink. Below the image you will find the typed version for easy reading and reference.

Every person is an artist, weaving stories upon their canvas of life…

The power of a story is quite incredible. They carry with them the ability to transform, destroy, be used as a tool or weapon, they unite or separate, uniquely individualistic, no two people tell the story the same, nor hear it the same… What would life be like without stories???

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The Story Reveals Itself…

Isn’t it fascinating how life unfolds for us, often despite our own actions. I enjoy watching people, observing their reactions, choices and way of interacting with the world around them. I often wonder, “did they consciously choose?” or “did they just go through the motions?”.

Life can change within a moment. We forget that, which is a blessing and a curse, I suppose. I catch myself getting caught up at times in the blind behavior of believing that the world “happens to me,” while in truth, I am choosing how I interact with the world.

In the pages of our life we choose the cast of characters, what we feel, dream, create, share… Do not put your book of life in the hands of another or upon the dusty shelf…

In today’s sharing at The BEingness Project – A Fictional Invitation, will Rita be able to keep it a secret? Will she remember her inner most desires?

I hope you will join on the journey to discover what unfolds. The next page release happens on Wednesday. Until then, I ask you, what would you do if you were Rita?

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Vulnerable Joy and Nervous Peace…

Sometimes stepping forward in life means accepting a level of imperfection, knowing that with time, patience and persistence it will become what you envision. I have been promising myself for weeks that I would start sharing my fiction work, that I would wedge between the cracks of my full time job and life obligations the various musings that bubble up in my writer’s mind.

Today I followed through! It feels scary, vulnerable, raw, peaceful, exciting and joyful, a furious mix of emotions. I can feel within my heart and soul it is the right thing for me to do. I have always been a writer, a wordsmith beckoned to express. Words even arrive in my dreams, floating suspended on a blackboard or white empty space. They will also chant repeatedly in my sleeping head until I wake to write them down.

I did not ask for words to be my breath, they just arrive with the inhale and exhale of life...

As I walk they rise up through my legs, flowing into my heart, advancing then into my meandering mind. These are the words you will find etched in the new section titled “BEingness Musings” at The BEingness Project site. These are raw unfiltered musings, free from editing, critiquing and justifying. They arrive as flowing gifts, that I unwrap upon the page.

My fictional dance unfolds piece by piece at – The BEingness Project – A Fictional Invitation. Here you just might be surprised to discover how you relate to the characters, get wrapped up in the interwoven story and find yourself questioning the path you are on…

Stories have the power to transform, to open our hearts and minds to new horizons…

I invite you to BE with me. To dream. To live vibrantly alive. To awaken your hearts desires. To stir your passions. To remember your child-like wonder, joy, love and pure presence.

I conclude in heartfelt gratitude, for while I may not know you personally, I do feel your presence. I am humbled to have you journey with me. It is exciting and comforting to go forth into what is next, knowing you are adventuring alongside…

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BEing = Flowing Muse…

As the years tick by my craving for BEing rises. In this sweet suspended state there is only flow. It awakens a vibrational environment from within that connects me to all throughout eternity – no beginning or end. BEing, to me is a pure state of oneness, like walking on a cloud as the world around me buzzes in chaos. The stillness is infinite and multi-layered. I suppose it is the state often referenced by meditators (which I practice daily), spiritual practitioners, healers and those pure of heart in their religious practice. We are each unique in our journey and thus I do not pretend to know another’s connection to this grand indescribable space. I do know I wish it for every soul, for it releases one from the confines of concrete robotic existence to a place of detached joyous observation. Letting go of yesterday and tomorrow, to freely float in the present moment.

Meditating is a wonderful way to start a journey of BEing…

When I was young, I frequented this space with no knowledge of what I was genuinely doing, it was natural, freeing, joyous and full of unexpected discoveries. Sitting still or walking within the arms of nature opened the invitation for me to BE.

BEingness exists at all times, in all places and spaces, free to everyone, it awaits an invitation…

In our programed world we are often taught to lose this part of ourselves, severing our connection to the pure potential that always is. Most of my life I did not talk about or share with anyone this divine space of pure grace, for I struggled to find words which could truly embody its pureness of spirit. I still cannot explain, for it is not a state of BEing which can be described. I have often wondered if it is how people feel when they partake of drugs or alcohol, having only experienced the latter. In my personal journey with alcohol I have enjoyed its buzzing sensation that drops walls and opens creative spaces. However, I can say for myself that it does not touch the glorious space of vibrational BEing. Delightedly BEing has no harmful physical impacts, unlike alcohol or drugs and is scientifically proven to have powerful health benefits, so I’ll take more of that please.

This weekend has deliciously been all about following this bliss, letting it quietly guide my actions with authentic presence. Turning off my domesticated (see blog post on Domestication) taught brain to welcome the unadulterated state of joy which dances inexhaustibly to co-create anything, to stroll freely in dreams, curiosity, wonder and “what if”.

Happiness, peace, contentment, grace, potential, energy…, all reside in the flow of BEing

Last night I indulged in a sunset river walk. Absorbing the smells of late summer, admiring the suns red goodbye and marveling at the subtle play between water and land. People on bicycles sped by, fishermen cast their flies upon the rivers sway and walkers busily chatted amongst themselves. I travelled in their midst, floating in my bubble of BEing (state of BEing), merrily observing it all.

In this state my muse vibrantly awakens. Like a rollicking cherub it blissfully gurgles with thoughts, dreams, poems, songs, passion, love and contented peace. Like the river that flowed beside me, my muse meandered into the vast land of wonder and delight.

I often wonder, what would the world be like if everyone gifted themselves with just ten minutes or more per day of BEing. Gracing themselves with the unlimited potential that quietly resides between their inhale/exhale, pulsing with their heart and soul (an invitation to BE).

While preparing to slumber, I invited my muse to finish its writing. Concluding the flow of words that bubbled forth during my evening stroll…

Let Me…

Let me flow upon your ripple of time…

Let me catch my breath in your whisper…

Let me feel the depth of infinity in your feathered caress and raging passion…

Let me rest my head upon the textured warmth of your rhythmic heart…

Let me weep into the recesses of yesterday, the songs of tomorrow and the cracks in your skin…

Let me dance upon the soft sparkle of your dreams, engraving them upon the tapestry of life…

Let me release into the storm of your desires, abandoning myself into the rapture of oneness…

Let me run wild and free in the stirrups of your steed, thundering into the abyss of intertwined eternity…

Let me remember all the times our souls collided, birthing another star in the galactic Milky Way…

Let me….

I conclude with an invitation – Today I invite to you reacquaint yourself with your inner state of BEing. The space where all your dreams live, your passions, desires, wonders, joy, peace, love, grace… Like the blooming of a flower it awaits your invocation.