I experience that most people believe they know, know another, know why a person acts this way or that, know what causes someone to do something, know why they feel a certain way, know… However, we cannot know.
Even when it is our children, parents, family or close friends, we cannot know. The journey of each single human being is unique. How we experience life, interpret what happens, react and live is completely individualistic.
Why then do we spend so much time trying to persuade another to think like we do? Convince them of living a certain way? Doing things the way we want?
What would the world be like if we accepted, valued and honored each individual for exactly who they are? Allowing them to BE, free of judgment and coercion.
I chuckle at this thought, for I am not sure we can do it. It seems to be an intrinsic behavior to seek like minded souls and if we don’t find them to try hard to make someone become more like us.
I freely admit I am very guilty of this behavior. Passionately so in my early twenties, I was eager to convince all who would listen that we should eat healthy, exercise, care about the environment, etc…. Of course I still have my strong personal feelings about life, how I prefer to live, what I like to do and to whom I like to share time with. However, I have come to understand that I cannot know, ever.
I find this to be wonderful, for it means I will always get to hear a different story. Learn something new. Look at something from a different perspective. It keeps the world interesting. It also means I get to be ME, freely with delight.
I invite you to play with this idea –
Ask a sibling or friend to share about an experience you both participated in – notice the differences and similarities.
Talk with a colleague about something you both attended, same time and place – did they experience the same things?
Explore memories with your partner/spouse, friend, children…?
It can be eye opening to learn how differently we each experience the world. We can never KNOW what another feels or experiences.
The title of my blog site is “Walking Naked Truth”, if you check out the “About” page you will get an in depth explanation of this title. In today’s writing I come to the page wishing to embody and present the “naked truth”, so we may “walk” towards that which we fear and face it.
At this unusual time in our history there is an increased sensation of fear, worry and stress as I discussed in my other blog site – “The Beingness Project”. Where do these feelings bubble up from, why are they on the rise, paralleling the numbers of COVID-19 diagnosed cases?
It has been my experience in this life journey that humans have this belief that they can control. That they are in control. That they “make things happen” and “make things stop”. I marvel at this belief and unspoken desire to force the flow, versus be in the flow.
The raw truth, everything is always “Uncertain” and actually “out of our control”. We merely choose to steer the rudder, or attempt to push life the direction we want it to go. Often there is this feeling or belief that we are making it happen. Is this true? Let’s explore it.
Someone in your family moves away, gets sick or changes an aspect of their life, does that impact you?
A tornado spins through your town, does that change life?
Your boss lets you go, does that impact your present reality?
You win or inherit a million dollars, does that create change in your life?
Your child falls and breaks a leg, will this change daily life for you?
You birth a healthy baby into your life, will life stay the same or be in your control?
You know that I can go on and on and on, for the truth is, one never knows. Often we are blessed to have life flow along as we “think it should”, keeping us in a state of belief that we have it all under control. In a mere second it could all change.
Here is the glorious freedom in accepting that life is a journey of “Uncertainty” , you ALWAYS have the opportunity to CHOOSE how you will react. No matter what is happening, unfolding, or becoming you get to choose how you will BE in that moment. You are also at choice with how you will feel as you decide what you want to do next, create, have, etc… (Explore this more deeply in a previous post)
COVID – 19 has us all staring down the barrel of uncertainty. Sitting deeply in the truth that something we cannot see is actually in control. We can choose fear, we can choose worry, we can choose to be stressed. However, I prefer to choose quiet reflective calm. Breathing into the truth that I can choose how I want to feel right here, right now. (Here is a worksheet for you to play with). I know I cannot change the virus. I know I cannot personally cure it. I know what I can do to support my family. I know what I can do to help others to the best of my ability. I know that it will CHANGE, another given truth. Change is always taking place.
I personally like to look at what I fear, worry about, or allow to stress me out, for as I truly notice and investigate, I quickly discover that in truth “I am okay”. As I calm down and breathe more deeply into BEing okay, I can more easily explore the deeper cause of my concern. In doing this I then realize that by letting go with trust and doing the best I can, the vulnerable open space I step into puts me back into the natural flow of life. I stop trying to swim upstream and force the tide. (See relevant post regarding 2009, when I did “lose” everything)
I invite you, I invite all of us, to breathe deeply. To look at “uncertainty” with the realization that it is not just now that this is the truth, but always. Then we can breathe more deeply into the space with gratitude, for this means we can let go and choose how we want to feel right now. Walking with acceptance and inner knowing that life is an uncertain journey, we empower and accept each individual unique path. There will be bumps along the way, some may even change life drastically, yet, each person is at choice to choose how they want to feel in the NOW moment.
I believe it is a gift to experience the spectrum of emotions we are given as a human – joy, sad, loss, happy, anger, excitement, anticipation, concern, doubt, fear, love, grace, worry, peace, etc… I like to recognize and feel the diversity of emotions life offers me. I get to honor them and reflect on why I am feeling that way, what I want to do with it and if I wish to change it. If I allow it all to flow, versus holding onto the emotion, stuffing it, or blaming someone else, then I am calmly free to move into what I want to experience and maybe even learn from the process. The power I have is in CHOOSING how I will react and BE in the life experience that is always unfolding and becoming.
At this time in history we are being given a chance to see, feel and understand ourselves more deeply. Life is uncertain. I think it would be a very boring journey if we could control everything. Uncertainty stimulates a journey, an adventure to learn, grow and expand into what comes next. Uncertainty is an empowering bridge to a life of choice. It gifts us with opportunities to practice choosing how we want to feel and BE.
So lets look at Uncertainty with Naked Truth and Walk forward into the flow of life –
How do you want to feel?
What about this pandemic worries you the most?
Can you look straight at that worry/fear?
When you look at it from your heart and not your mind (turn off the news), does it shift?