I wish I could put it in a bottle for you. A special bottle, unique to you, one that when opened, would release the rich vapors of peace, faith, love and joy. Your body like a dry sponge would absorb the craved sensations, replacing all fear, worry, doubt and discomfort. Like fresh oxygen for your lungs, the healing vapors would fill you up with the inner knowing that all is well. You can and will make it through this time.
I’ve been here before. While it is vastly different, it also drips of immense similarity. Twelve years ago I walked the tightrope of uncertainty. Worry nagged, pulled and poked at the corners of my mind, my head a pin cushion to the uncertainties in my life.
I clung to my home with every raw finger nail I had left. I applied to every possible job opportunity that might work. I topped the charts in creative cooking, stretching the rice beyond its palatable enjoyment.
Despite all my efforts, sleepless nights, fearful pacing and quiet praying, I was at the end of the timeline. The bank repossessed the home where my children were born. The bank quietly towed away our vehicle. My son was finishing 3rd grade, my daughter kindergarten. Standing solitarily in the middle of my home, I breathed a final good bye to life as I knew it and stepped into what came next…
Fear is a massively powerful virus, it will eat you from the inside out. It will age you, turning brown hair gray. It has no prejudice. It does not care how far it spreads. And it exponentially grows, creeping into every crevice.
I stand on the other side of all this. Blessed to examine this life changing time in the rearview mirror of my life. March 2007 to May 2011 turned our world upside down and inside out. I grew up! I learned that the human spirit is “stronger than it thinks”, that together we can keep stepping. Sometimes life is trying to give you something more, even though it feels like life is being ripped out of you.
Today, unlike the financial crisis of 2008-2009, we are ALL in this together. Today, there is worldwide compassion. Today, I get notifications from companies that they will work with me financially. Today, we are interconnected globally.
My humbling journey twelve years ago gifted me in ways that words cannot express. It did change my life, it did push me up against the wall, it did give me gray hair, it did teach me what is truly important.
I wish I could bottle it up for you. A special bottle, unique to you, one that when opened, would release the rich vapors of peace, faith, love and happiness. I know, truly I know that –
What you most desire to feel is already within you. It cannot be bought or sold…
You are stronger than you think…
Within you lies a peaceful space, one that holds preciously your dreams and desires...
This time on our planet can be an opportunity, a chance to reflect, to notice, to appreciate, to choose…
You are not alone…
Here is your bottle – please open it with complete peace, faith and love…
As a young girl I loved to sit at my small dark wood desk, resting underneath the solo window of my bedroom. A breeze spiraling in with sounds of the outside world. I would sit in that quiet reverie contemplating life, listening to the birds, the trees, the layers of silence. Feeling safe and held by the home which had stood strong since its construction during the great depression. I often wondered about the hands and hearts that built the large log cabin I lived in. They were on the road, away from family, working physically hard every day to send money home to those they loved. The Civilian Conservation Corps set up during the depression by President Franklin D. Roosevelt left a trail of crumbs across this nation in the form of log cabins, tree plantings, bridge building, forest fire fighting and so much more. I was gifted at age nine to move into one of these historic homes, it cradled me with stoic wisdom. In my heart, I shall always feel, hear, smell and resonate with the home and land that “built me”.
Today as I sit upon my fifteen dollar wicker garage sale chair, I am blessed to feel the soft caress of a spring breeze, watch the ripples on the pond and hear the song of birds intermixed with the distant buzz of traffic. This sweet little sanctuary is tucked in the center of a busy city, a diamond hidden in the hard concrete that swaddles it. I watch and listen as people walk by on the nature trail across the pond, they meander a path sandwiched between the Boise River and the planned suburban neighborhood. I wonder what they are thinking at this interesting time in our world. The dogs with them merrily celebrate the chance to play with their human being, living completely in the present moment as always in joyful glee and curiosity.
I get to sit here doing what I love, putting word to page, because the world is on “lockdown”, a time of shutting away to protect ourselves and each other from the COVID-19 pandemic. It is a sad and scary time and yet it is also an opportunity to slow down, reflect, feel and notice what is most important.
In the last few days I have noticed more families than ever before on the nature path. I have actually observed teenagers and young people, a rare sighting in the wooded arena. The natural world has become the safe zone, a place we can stretch our legs and allow movement to soothe the inner nagging fears. In the last few days I have watched my own children who are now young adults, play games, create art, read books, and for my son, prepare to finish his junior year of college online.
Personally I have found myself deeply searching what truly matters to me. While I am blessed to be off the treadmill of daily expectations and busy-ness, I tour what beckons my heart and soul? What do I dream to live and experience before I leave this planet? What makes me smile and feel vibrantly alive?
I have chuckled at the answers to these questions, for they are not a surprise. Instead they return full circle to the same dreams as that young girl sitting beneath her windowsill at her little wooden desk. I am still a simple person, a content introspective quiet soul. I find great joy in noticing the subtle changes in a flower that has started its blooming journey. Peace rises and percolates within me for the consistent grace and flow of nature, its tenacity and on going perseverance. Its exudes courage and strength as it bends and furls in response to the impacts of humans and mother nature. Like us, it is often at the mercy of what gets hurled upon it. The ebb and flow of tides perpetuate across the globe despite the human struggles at this time. Nature endures, we endure…
Nature mirrors for me what is possible.
To sprout and become in adversity.
To radiate beauty in the midst of chaos.
To serenade in perfect harmony amid the onslaught of man’s machines.
To acquiesce with perseverance and complete faith…
Like a fallen leave floating in forced surrender upon the turbulent waters of a fast moving river…
In time it shall eddy in quiet stillness, catching it’s breath, taking in the view…
Rising, falling, twisting, flipping, floating, where and when shall its journey end..?
Only to begin again…
~ Fawn Caveney
In this unexpected challenging time, what are you noticing about yourself and the life you live?
I am curious what you might be discovering as you are forced to slow down and BE?
Are you able to feel into gratitude for the hidden blessings?
Has your compassion expanded or contracted?
How can you use this time to reconnect to the self, ignite dreams?
What are the creative ways you can connect with others?
In the surrender can you find the inner peace that resides within?
For me, in this moment, I have been allowed the time to remember. To come home to the quiet little girl dreams. Sure, I could go down the path of fear, it is there tapping on my door. How would that serve me, or those I love? As I breathe in deeply, feeling the truth that each moment is pure grace, never to return again, I choose to hear, listen, feel and notice. How do I wish to spend the next moment? As always we are at choice to BE or react.
As you read that title, what is your first response?
What do you hear your mind say the second you read it?
Yeah, sure you hear me!
No you don’t! No one really listens anymore.
I don’t really share, so how can you hear me.
Have you ever noticed how quickly you start to think about what you are going to say to someone who is talking to you? There you stand formulating in your mind what you can say back. What’s the perfect thing to respond? When you do this, are you truly listening, sincerely hearing the person you are with?
If you are a parent, do you really listen to your child, no matter the age, to HEAR what they are sharing? Not just the words they speak, but the body language, the message sent from their eyes, tone, word choice, etc…
What about how you listen to a colleague, spouse/partner, friend, family member, stranger..? Do you listen differently depending on who is talking?
Have you ever noticed how much attention you will give to someone “important and powerful” by societal and cultural standards – yet when your child, friend, family member or co-worker share you only half way tune in? I observe this all the time.
Do you think you fool anyone with regard to your HEARING and Listening skills? People, especially the young and wise elders, KNOW when you are really listening or not. Just watch a baby who has a present or distracted parent. Observe your friend when you really sit and pay attention to their story versus being fidgety to battle for conversation rights. There is an intuitive knowing when someone is truly LISTENING and HEARING YOU.
I have watched and observed this for years and years. Noticing within my own behavior the expansion of my ability to truly HEAR. As I have gotten older and wiser, my ability to HEAR and LISTEN has increased, enriching my life in so many ways.
When I worked in a nursing home, daycare, restaurant, sales rep., customer service specialist, ropes course facilitator and classroom teacher – HEARING was key. Active, Present Listening enriched, expanded and opened all of these professions into glorious opportunities for co-learning and co-growing through genuine heartfelt sharing.
We all crave a safe place to share. The desire to be truly heard is as powerful as the desire to be seen. In the chaos and busyness it is often a challenge to get people to drop into TRUE sharing, however, I have learned that BEing completely present, making eye contact with sincerity and truly Listening opens the flood gates for powerful connection.
I strongly believe that one of the most important gifts I can give myself and others is to HEAR. To Listen with intense complete presence, shutting off my mind chatter. I absolutely LOVE the connection experienced when I truly listen – WOW.., it is intensely powerful. Full of surprises and new understandings.
What if today, you challenged yourself to slow down and really HEAR? What might you learn about your partner/spouse, friend, child, co-worker, etc..? How might you feel as you allow this true connection? What might you learn about yourself and others? Below are a couple of articles that briefly discuss Listening, I thought you might enjoy them.
The one thing that is for sure, change occurs. It is a part of everything. Everyday there is change. Seasons, aging, growing, learning, experiencing, building, expansion… If we embrace this truth, we free ourselves to enjoy, relax and let go of the need to control.
If you are a parent, would you ever wish to stop your child’s expansion into adulthood? As a child once yourself, would you have wanted your parents to control your becoming? From birth we are changing. We can fight it or embrace it with joy, knowing it is a part of life.
As I look in the mirror seeing the gray hair, the smile lines, the change in my skin, teeth, body, I am at choice to LOVE what I see, celebrating the grace and gifts of aging – or – I can fight it, hide it, color and mask it. Why? Who do I deceive in this denial?
I personally love watching the seasons flow. Each season has such unique expressions. There is continual change from one day to the next. The ducklings become adult ducks. The leaves and blossoms arrive to cycle into death and back again. Even in places where the seasons do not shift, there is change, nature is perpetually morphing.
Today what if you accepted the Truth that life is full of Change? What if you not only embraced this reality, you actually chose to celebrate it. How would such a shift impact your life? Would you stop worrying, stop trying to control, relax and allow?
People change, thus relationships change… Jobs shift and adapt to what comes next… Everyone exists on the timeline of life, aging is a part of the journey… Your life adventure infuses you with new understandings, growth, discoveries, lessons and glorious experiences – how fun to embrace with Truthful knowing that you are Changed by all of it.
I am one who embraces change with curiosity, openness, trust and faith. As I flow with Change, I am free.
Today’s Walking Naked Truth Practice:
Today notice your reactions to change. As you notice, decide if you want to react like a victim or celebrate with trust.
Begin to become aware of how “fighting change” has impacted your life.
Today at The BEingness Project I begin to explore the simple awareness of BEingness in everyday life. Noticing how we interact and react in our daily interactions can shift everything. Small daily practices can move you out of a Reactionary life and into a life of BEingness – a life of Choice.
Yesterday I posted a very full Vlog on The Beingness Project; it reflected and explored the last 2 months. I invite you to take a peek, it has some fun offerings for your spirit, body and mind.
I find great humor everyday in how people “Want it NOW”with regard to peace of mind, joyful living, healthy body, financial security, successful relationship, etc… Yet they are not willing to look at their present moment. Each moment compounds upon the next, so the daily choice of how we are BEing in our moments affects and compounds to create the life we live.
If you have been building up the Stress, Anxiety, Depression, Unhealthy Body, and Victim muscle for years, YOU will have to focus on Making Different Choices moment by moment. In time you will shift from the Old Stories to a new space of BEingness. Now here is a powerful truth – it could ALL change NOW – however that means you are going to have to CHOOSE to BE NOW and NOW and NOW and… you get the idea. So, it is likely not going to happen overnight, for you have been practicing how NOT to BE for most of your life. When you were a young baby and child you intrinsically knew how to BE – you exuded joy, love, playfulness and BEing present.
Today in The Beingness Project I posted a brief sharing on “Why BEingness” – looking at statistics regarding our expanding chaotic world. I am completely perplexed sometimes on why people Choose to live such stressful Reactionary lives. There is a Choice! Why would one not wish for a more peaceful, joyful, loving, vibrant life. I know we are taught it is outside of us – yet every religion and spiritual teaching informs us – it is INSIDE of US.
Can you gift yourself this week with some daily choice to honor your BEingness?
Can you give yourself the time to BE, feeling your inner truth?
Can you STOP Reacting and Start BEing one moment at a time?
In today’s BEingness Project Vlog, I list some ways you can begin to shift into BEing. Below is a simple meditation to help you get started.
I invite you to comment, message or email me (firstname.lastname@example.org) with your daily struggles. Let’s explore together how we can shift from Reaction to BEing – seeing how BEingness applies to daily situations, helps to unravel the stress, worry, fear and chaos. I am excited to share how wonderful BEingness feels.
Thank you for joining me today. May all your moments flow with grace… Fawn
I have been quiet for a few days now, exploring the nagging feelings about this blog, my Vlog site (The Beingness Project) and my Youtube channel. It is imperative to me that I am congruent with my inner self. That I Walk my Naked Truth in all ways; coming to this page with pure intention, presence and free of all agenda.
Why do I come to the page, first because writing is a part of who I am. The pen at the end of my hand and the flow of ink onto the page has been a part of me like the inhale and exhale of life. It gives me immense joy and infinite expansiveness to move into the flow of words.
I come to the page secondly, because I wish for all people to feel the awe, joy and love of BEING. To dance within the luscious space of fluid contentment, infinite peace and sensual joy. It is a space we intuitively know as a child. We eagerly explore, look with curious delight and express with abandoned wonderment. As the open child we feel everything that comes up, we let it flow, express, BE. Then this raw naked expression is squelched, judged and criticized. Taught to be controlled, denied and ignored.
I recently perused some of my first blog entries from four years ago (read here), smiling in gratitude at the pictures of my children who were still shorter than I. What a marvelous journey we have shared, what glorious rich lessons life has graced us with. WOW! Life is a very dynamic colorful tapestry.
Today, most people have stopped reading this by now, for it is too long, takes too much time, interrupts the “To Do List” and does not “FIX” things. I sit still within my quiet fishbowl, looking out at the chaotic world around me. Everyone is DOING, going forth to conquer their life. Suppressing and denying themselves the grandest gift of all, to BE present. To truly EXPERIENCE the inexhaustible sensations and nuances of a vibrant engaged life.
So, why do I write? Why this blog? Why “The Beingness Project”? They are all an invitation to YOU, to come home to your Naked Truth, To BE. You do not need to Fix Yourself, for You are already Enough, Worthy and Perfect. All you have to do is remember how to BE present in ALL your moments. Then life begins to blossom in magnanomous grace.
This blog “Walking Naked Truth”, “The Beingness Project Vlog” and “Youtube channel“ exist to help you awaken and remember your joyful, vibrant, loving self. Each of us lost this natural state in our Domestication process, replacing genuine curiosity with judgmental distrust. Losing our sense of playfulness to proper ways of expression based on our societal, cultural and family Expectations.
My recent struggle has been to stay TRUE to me. To BE Authentic and Congruent with my values, ethics and desires. There are many people I respect, admire and look to for inspiration, teaching, lessons, etc… However at this time in our world, what I experience is an excruciating bombardment of sh** in my email in box, my Facebook page and Instagram site. The introvert in me wants to UNPLUG it all, run away and hide. At the same time I love that I get to learn from those I admire with the ease of a Google search. So.., what is the balance?
Everyone I have thus far turned to for learning how to make a living from my expertise says I must:
post frequently (I like this one)
send consistent emails to my followers
push myself on social media so I gain more followers
push, push, push through this format or another!!
focus on using certain SEO words/triggers to be found
While I understand the need for such action (I did study business in college) and can see how it works (funnels, channel, spread), I cannot do it and feel good. My sharing is about BEing. My message is to BE. To re-discover that space within you that is already happy, peaceful, loving and excited about life. To help you remember how amazing you are just by BEing YOU. To reunite you with that infinite space of acceptance, grace and love.
After four days of deep inner exploration I have found my peaceful truth. I cannot bombard your email box, I will not nag you with ads. I AM HERE if you desire to journey with me. My gift to the world has always been to BE the safe loving place. Thus this page must reflect the essence of BEing, offering tools to help you on that journey back home to your inner magnificence.
I shall offer meditations, videos, worksheets and written exploration. You are free to Follow me or check in as you desire. Your free will gets to decide if you will engage to peel back the layers of your masks to joyfully reacquaint yourself with your natural state of BEingness.
It is my dream that all who seek shall come home to the unlimited jubilance of a life immersed in BEING. Absorbing its expansive loving peaceful contentment. It is a space that once fully remembered always beckons you back into its free flow.
This blog and the other stuff I share is a delightful exploration of Surrender. To let go and trust that if it is meant to serve, it shall grow and become thanks to those who hear its message and resonate with its truth. A test to see if people are so numbed that they cannot notice or take action to spread a way of BEing. I am blessed to come to the page free of all Expectations, to share from a pure state of BEing, for only then will you experience how life is happening for you, inviting you to remember the joy of laughter, the fun of dancing, the inspiration of music, the love of self and others…
I thank you for joining me. I thank you for Being YOU. I thank you for all the ways you grace the world with your unique magnificence. I thank you for sharing.
In Joyful Humble Gratitude,
Life Artist and Dancer
One of the most powerful gifts I have ever given myself is the time to meditate. There are many ways to meditate and hundreds of resources to explore what works for you. I started meditating without knowing what I was doing when I was about 5 years old. Throughout my life it is where I turn to remember and touch the truth of Who I Truly Am…
As the years have zoomed by, meditation has ebbed and flowed in my life. As I started my previous business in 2009, I began to incorporate it into my work with clients. Utilizing the vibrational elements of it when I shared energy work. In my present business, The Beingness Project, meditation has become an integral part of the sharing.
About two years ago I discovered that once I was in the meditative space, it guided me. I was no longer Fawn Caveney in meditation, I was an energy, with words and images flowing through. The words and images are not mine, they come from an infinite energetic vibrational space. As I work one on one with clients I often find myself gifted to experience their images and feelings; together we are guided by this enlightened vibrational energy.
Recently I took the leap of faith to share the channeled guided meditations on my Youtube channel. I humbly invite whoever feels called to enjoy the journey they offer. Below is one of these meditations, for you to check out.
I would love to hear about your meditation experiences. I also welcome any feedback, suggestions and comments, for I am just learning how to record and share these meditations (still have lots to learn with technology).
May your day be full of joy, peace, love, and expansive Surrender.