Featured

Chasm Between Childhood & Elder…

Her eyes sparkle with joyful trust, her feet skip with abandoned freedom, her voice rises with no apology and her hands reach for the dust that sparkles in glittered suspension. She is free, wild and in ecstatic expression of the bliss which always is…

Her face was lined from years of living. Her eyes twinkled, bursting with memories etched like fireworks on a dark night. Her smile beckoned one to sit and listen. Her legs no longer danced, they lay bent and disfigured on the bed, raw open bed sores seeping at her hips. Her vibrant spirit encircled you the moment you stepped into her space, there was no victim in this room, no woe is me, instead one was greeted with dynamic passion, simple happiness, and a peacefulness that gently kissed you on the cheek. 

Who are the “her’s” I speak of? The first is me, dancing in my childhood living room, chasing the sun dust I stirred up with my exuberant joy. The second “her” is a divine woman I was blessed to care for in a nursing home years ago. Her aliveness, grace, peace, and love still dance in my memory. She and others I cared for knew a truth, as did the child in me. 

What did they know? They knew that happiness, love, peace and contentment always exist. They knew tranquility and exuberance did not exist in things outside themselves. They knew that it was accessible in all moments. They knew that no one could give it to them, yet they lovingly shared it. They knew it was a choice.

The years and space between innocent curious childhood and the wisdom of one’s latter years is full of “shoulds,” “comparisons,” “judgments,” and the measuring of oneself against a society often textured with fear and distrust. I do not have to sit very long in a cafe before I can hear someone criticizing themselves, or attacking someone else. The stories swirl around like the sound of an espresso machine, surging like the white foam with blame, shame, hurt, victimhood and discontent. It breeds like flies on a patio table, snatching up every scrappy morsel to inject the psyche with why life is so miserable. 

Why do humans choose this? A question I have pondered since I was five years old. Why do we let go of our passionate desires to instead fly someone else’s kite? Why do we slam the door on the pure potential of joy? Why do we kick happiness to the curb, to welcome and invite stressful frustration? Why do we say “have to” instead of “get to”? Why do we choose to go through our days and moments on auto-pilot, waiting for someone or something else to make us better? Do we prefer to wait, to lie on our deathbed watching the autobiographical movie of regret? Why do we look in the mirror with such self contempt and hatred, for as young children we loved our reflection? I ask all of this with curiosity and a desire to understand.

A body twitches with delightful anticipation when a matchstick of wonder is lit beneath…

In my sophomore year of college I was blessed to work at an international daycare. Here I witnessed children from all over the world. They danced, played, laughed, cried, and enacted make believe stories together. Dynamically they engaged with each moment in present enthusiasm, viewing the world as a frontier to be explored. I sensed that the older children were on the fringe of losing this curious wonderment. In their play I observed them mimicking adults, their eyes became serious, their jaw set tightly, their voices lowered into somberness, like smoke their joy, spontaneity, compassion and kindness disappeared into the passing wind gust, leaving behind a robotic body controlled by the “taught” mind. 

Three years after working in a daycare, I found myself working in a nursing home. Here I discovered the grace and vengeance of aging. I was gifted to share time with souls who lived a full passionate life and others who were embittered with regret. The extreme chasm between the two slapped me stingingly as I would leave one room to enter the other. My heart and soul ached for those fighting their own shadow, their anger and inability to forgive expressed through pinches, punches, and verbal abuse as I tried to assist them to the toilet, shower or dining hall. Off the clock, I cherished the moments I got to sit and listen to the stories from those celebrating life. Stories of falling in love, having children, riding in a car for the first time, rising above struggle, appreciating the gentle flow of seasons, years, experiences, and the pure grace of a life lived fully. 

In my forties I found myself teaching language arts to junior high students. Here I witnessed the cross over in technicolor poignancy. A few young people desperately clung to their innocent pure belief that anything is possible, that one could reach for their dreams with unbridled passion. The majority of the students had given up, they did not dream, instead they chased visions of their future painted on the wall by parents and society. They swallowed hard the doses of expectations fed to them with the famous mantras, “when I have lots of money I will be happy, when I get my degree I will be happy, when I buy a house I will be happy, when I marry I will be happy, WHEN I… I will then be HAPPY. 

Ironically the joke is on us, for much of life is lived between the wild child and the wise elder. Thus I am forever grateful for the life altering gift of witnessing snapshots of age through my diverse professional life. They have  graced me with an awareness and microscopic view that life is really just a brief sojourn. A brief interlude to experience as I choose. 

Today I watch the sun dust with the pure delight of my four year old wonderment, I dance with unlimited joy, for I am not young, nor old, I am in between, kissing each spec of time with gratitude. 

Today I invite you to join me, breathe deeply into the child you once were before life manipulated you. 

Today I encourage you to take back the string to your own kite, feel it dance freely upon the winds of raw, wild adventurous, exploration. 

Invitations to play:

  • Dance to your favorite music.
  • Sing with unbridled enthusiasm.
  • Daydream upon the page, letting the ink describe what your heart can imagine.
  • Play the “what if” game – on a piece of paper and/or in your mind play out the potential of following a dream…
  • Meditate quietly, letting the images and thoughts arise from within.
  • Color, paint, create, letting yourself express freely.
  • Close your eyes to feel into and remember the child within, what did you love, enjoy, imagine…
  • Invite your inner child to play, then get ready for some fun, as you embrace the wonder and curiosity.

I’m curious, do you prefer to hang around the serious, somber, practical person or find great joy in spending time around someone who is passionate, vibrant, dynamic and happily living life?

Your soul’s invitation…

Which one are you?

Featured

No Matter Where I GO, There I AM…

It has been way too long since I shared words upon this page. Sometimes I give in to the calling for a quiet hiatus, pausing to reflect, feel, explore and just BE. Often in this crazy world we forget what Just BEing can feel like. It seems to be ingrained into our personal psyche that if we are not DOing we must BE failing. I completely disagree!

The chaotic zoom of the world even in these times of COVID, incessantly taps on us like a crow pecking on a scavenged dirty cracker found upon a sidewalk. Over time we have become immune to such bombardment, calloused to the dings upon our “lifeblood” phone, the small inanimate object we take everywhere. Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, Pinterest, YouTube, the list continues to expand. I am not against technology, I am actually very grateful for how it has kept my scattered family connected during these isolated times. As a writer at heart, I love coming to the page to dance with my muse, leaving behind the typewriter white out and loud din of pecking on the keys. WhatsApp delights me, for I am free to communicate when I want, for as long as I desire and in whatever format I feel like engaging in – audio, images, video, all of this at my fingertips, literally.

Just BEing, seems to be a forgotten playmate and lost gift. As a child you engaged with it all the time, for it sparked creative ideas, imaginary scenes and pure bliss. As you grew up, you inhaled the taught (domesticated) expectations, accepting without question that there was only one path to happiness. You pushed aside your precious inspiring playmate to engage with the “to do” list, goal chart, success ladder, asset collecting, bank account and programed paradigms of societal expectations. Now, please understand, I am not against any of the above listed things, matter a fact, I engage in all of them. I ask them to align with me, my dreams, my passions, my priorities and personal desires. It allows me to design my unique empowered path.

During my recent hiatus from this page and my other blog The BEingness Project, I explored more deeply the authentic truth

“And remember, no matter where you go, there you are.”

~ Confucius
Is there truly a wrong or right path? What if all life choices were about exploring the rich diversity of possibility?

As I deeply feel into what I desire for the next phase of life, I give myself permission to squish around the sensations of each idea. As though I am an explorer investigating the textures, smells, sounds and ambiance of a puffy white cloud. Suspended above my purposed next adventure, I take it all in – why, where, who, what… It has been my life experience that we jump like a frog to the next lily pad hoping that it will “fix” our problems, change our situation, or answer our unspoken and unidentified hearts’ desire. While the leaping in and of itself is intoxicating and thrilling, it does not change the reality that wherever you go, there you are. As I play with the soft red clay that forms my life, I give myself the time to unearth the richness or deprivation of each scenario. Does it lift my wings or is it another distraction, an escape route that ultimately leads back to the same dead end cul de sac?

Oh I am poised to jump! All my muscles are taut and ready for my invitation. Delightfully wisdom has started to blossom in full glory, encouraging me to BE, to FEEL, to allow myself the TIME to witness the possibilities as they play out within my heart and soul. What calls me, pulls me towards my song, my story, my sharing…? Cutting away at the puppet strings attached without my knowing, I float in the free fall, trusting the parachute of my own inner GPS guidance. What an exciting time, to stand at the edge of a new horizon, vast, limitless, infinite and grand… The only limitation is that which I put upon myself. Lifting my wings, responding to my poised muscles and heart strings, I set sail. There is no RIGHT or WRONG path, only the knowing that I choose to live a life of no regret. As the astute saying shares, there is no Uhaul that follows us when we pass from this life, thus I wish to fill the coffers of my time here with vapor held experiences, rich colors painted upon my heart, breath stopping memories of love and grace, and laughter that carries me home…

Thank you for joining me today, I forgot how much fun it is to BE with you 🙏🏻💖. It is my absolute life passion that each and every one of us remembers how to BE, how to hear and feel our heart/soul call. Rising into a life of passion, dreams and desires. When we walk naked on this path of personal truth, we touch and lift all who connect with us along the way!

If you enjoyed this little blog, here are a couple of old posts that invite BEingness into your life ❤️

What is BEingness

Allowing the joyful grace of BEing

How to begin the allowing journey of BEing

Featured

Dreaming in the Daytime…

“Your Soul’s Invitation” – A fictional journey that epitomizes the adventure life can be when we follow our bliss, our heart’s desires… Click Here to read the latest or start fresh.

As we individually believe, we attract others who share in the dream, this connection lifts us into more…

Over the years I have refined my Daydreaming practice. It has become my way to explore ideas that bubble up, visions that roll through my mind and passions that tug on my heart strings. It has taken me years to cultivate and allow the Daydreaming gift to blossom. Growing up in a society and culture that is all about action and making it happen, leaves one feeling guilty if they are not setting goals to move towards a dream. The challenge for someone like myself is that I am “multi-passionate” a term created by one of my favorite women, Marie Forleo.

I have always been multi-passionate, most days 3 to 5 different ideas jig around my mind, playing with merriment and anticipatory potential. Often, I will be playing with these concepts then bang! Another possible scheme, percolates into my mind’s eye. Ugh.., how does one decide what action to take when they are being bombarded by so many desirable creative adventures. The sensation of this glorious daydreaming is like popcorn in a very hot pan, it pops with such intoxication! It is a high that elevates one, a pure shot of joyful passion. I sincerely wish for everyone to play, for can you just imagine how happy the world would be if everyone was imagining what can be.., versus being stuck in the old story. This high has only positive long term effects, while it is quite addictive, it will not lead you down a path of despair, it will invite you into the pure potential you are here to express and share.

I used to torment myself and others by trying to make it all happen. Taking action steps towards the various projects. Ultimately this wore me down, for I have this pattern of robbing from my sleep. As a single mom with two children, I had to maintain the day job to keep the lights on, thus the only place I could snag time was in the wee hours. I am still guilty of setting my alarm for 3:00 to 3:30am, for the precious morning time is when I can fuel the flames of my passions. I know this will not always be the case, for as I continue to nurture my dreams they are gaining momentum towards expansive growth.

So where does Daydreaming fit in? Well, to decipher and handle the massive flow of ideas, I play with them, like a cat with a mouse. I give my heart, mind and soul complete permission to play in the imaginary world. I journal in the dark of morning, letting the dreams come alive on the page and within me. It starts my day with such magic and excitement. I authentically allow my imagination to FEEL the sensations I might experience if I was to truly live out the plan/idea? Does it lead to something I truly wish to live day in and day out? Can I see doors opening along the way? When I live in this pretend Daydream, is it what I really want to FEEL and EXPERIENCE? Everything we desire in life is because we want to FEEL and EXPERIENCE something. Humans are purely driven by our hunger to receive certain sensations – love, acceptance, freedom, peace, joy, security, connection, etc….

I joyously allow myself to explore in the Daydream for as long as it takes to feel clarity. Clarity comes in diverse forms, sometimes I have lived the Daydream so thoroughly that I feel like I have already journeyed it, thus, I am complete, done, the idea has been experienced. At other times I experience an inspired action step (these have led to great miraculous journeys in my life) that leads towards my effervescent wish/dream. While still other explorations within my Daydreaming playground conclude at a dead end that feels completely burdensome and overwhelming – no thank you, I close the page on that idea and smile with satisfaction that I thoroughly explored it.

Why would I ever stop dreaming during my waking hours? Daydreaming is a delicious way to step into the next moments and potential adventures. I already know what is, why would I want to focus in my rearview mirror or floorboards? So much is out there for me to experience when I look out the front window, letting the past be the past.

I squeak my dreams into the cracks of time that life grants me. The wee hours of morning, the meanderings on walks, the moments of stillness I sneak into my present 9-5 job and the sweet sparks generated as I meditate upon waking and prior to going to sleep. My weekends are selfishly filled with inspired action towards my Day Dreams. I’m very excited about the long Christmas weekend, for I have pulled out a book proposal class I purchased four years ago. Enthusiastically I shall generate a book proposal for my nonfiction book series, “K.I.S.S. Keep It Sweetly Simple – Happiness is easy… Living a life of Choice.” This 6 little book series has twirled in my Daydreams for five years. I self published the first book in 2017, removing it recently from Amazon to edit and update. (Click Here or on the image below if you are curious to see the outline for the series.) Receiving a book offer with an advance would be intoxicating – giving me the freedom to write full time. Oh, I have so many books in my Daydream box 😊!

K.I.S.S. Series, Keep It Sweetly Simple, Happiness is Easy, Live a Life of CHOICE…

I often catch myself hoping to live long enough to enjoy at least half of the Daydreams that sparkle in my galactic imagination. Visions for communities that co-exist, healing campuses that support and shift our relationship in the medical world, bestselling books that entertain and serve, TV series that uplift and inspire…. I have learned over the years that Daydreams have wings! When I believe without question and live as though it already is, the miraculous occurrences line up to co-create and manifest.

I invite you in pure glee to gift yourself with a pilgrimage into your Day Dreaming space. Why not try it? It doesn’t cost money! It easily fits into your day while commuting, preparing meals, getting ready for work, etc…. Like little thought bubbles, Daydreams float about waiting for us to explore and envision.

If you wish to PLAY more with DayDreams here are some other posts including a downloadable Play Sheet

Until next time, I wish you and yours healthy and happy Daydreaming as we close 2020 to embark on what shall unfold in 2021.

Thank you for sharing time with me…

Featured

Daydreamers Create Tomorrow…

“Your Soul’s Invitation” is a fictional journey where people around the world awaken to the Daydreamer that lives inside. They are reminded by a chance encounter with a magazine – Click Here to continue on the adventure or begin the quest.

To dream is to believe that we are not limited by our present day reality…

I am curious, when was the last time you allowed yourself to DREAM? To feel, yes, I mean literally FEEL into what brings you joy?

Do you recall a time in your life when you heard someone say, “Get real!” or “Stop dreaming,” or “Would you get serious, that’s not possible,” or???

As a child did you like to daydream? To let your mind and heart wander? To imagine what you might experience, see, do?? Do you still allow yourself this playful exploration? Or did you allow the naysayers, the reality preachers and the nonbelievers to shut you down?

I cannot imagine our world without the Daydreamers, for they are the ones who created and continue to create our tomorrows. They envision what can be and move towards it without question. This takes great courage, faith and perseverance in a world of judges and critics who live from a place of stuck realism.

Let’s really explore this, where would we be today if these Dreamers did not or had not existed –

  • Thomas Edison
  • Wright Brothers
  • Marie Sklodowska Curie
  • Rosa Parks
  • Martin Luther King
  • Alexander Graham Bell
  • Henry Ford
  • Ada Lovelace (check this one out…)
  • Emmeline Pankhurst
  • Leonardo da Vinci
  • Nikola Tesla
  • Steve Jobs
  • Gandhi
  • Abraham Lincoln
  • Albert Einstein
  • Socrates, Plato
  • Nelson Mandela
  • ETC…..

Thankfully this list goes on and on.., for to dream and believe is to live a vibrant, dynamic, passionate life, engaged in what is, while holding tight to the kite of tomorrow’s potential.

It is interesting to imagine our world without those who bring their dreams to life. Those strong enough to “walk their talk” without question or doubt. Along the way they often fall down or fail as we like to label it, yet, they get up and persevere.

Thomas Edison, one of many great inventors, role modeled incredible perseverance and complete belief…

I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.

Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves.

Thomas Edison

Often in my daily world I am surrounded by the realist, the one who sees what is, gets stuck there and is not able to imagine what might be. I have learned to not bring them into my intimate friend circle, for they are the first to criticize my dreams, to roll their eyes or shake their heads at my “fantasy world” or “crazy pipe dreams.” These same people enjoy turning on a light switch, utilizing a car to get places, flying in a plane to visit a new corner of the world, use a computer/phone to communicate with friends and family around the world, hmmmm…, I wonder where they think these things came from?

We love the line from Martin Luther King Jr., “I have a dream…” He envisioned a world of equality, as did Nelson Mandela, Gandhi and…

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.

There is nothing more tragic than to find an individual bogged down in the length of life, devoid of breadth.

Let no man pull you so low as to hate him.

Martin Luther King Jr.

Live life as though nobody is watching, and express yourself as though everyone is listening.

Everyone can rise above their circumstances and achieve success if they are dedicated to and passionate about what they do.

A winner is a dreamer who never gives up.

Nelson Mandela

I reflect back at how often along my life path I have been told to “get real,” “get my head out of the clouds,” “it’s nice to dream Fawn, but, how can you ever create that…” Most of these people are well intentioned, they want what is “best” for me. I have learned to selectively share my dreams and visions for the future, holding them preciously in my heart, soul and mind’s infinite space. I prefer to keep the company of Dreamers, those who inspire and remind me that anything is possible.

Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.

The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious.

Although I am a typical loner in daily life, my consciousness of belonging to the invisible community of those who strive for truth, beauty, and justice has preserved me from feeling isolated.

Albert Einstein

Like Einstein I am a typical loner in my daily life. While I am factually surrounded by colleagues, customers, friends and family, I wander within my own passionate dream bubble, a space that is energized by the “invisible community.” It is an interesting space to hold. Being completely present while maintaining the vibrational energy of that which I believe is possible. In the wee hours of my quiet morning, weekends, or evening time I step towards my Daydreams. They are becoming. Yes, you cannot see them yet in this time and space, however, they are energetically manifesting. My joyous faith knows and feels them.

As humans we are driven by a desire to feel. To experience the sensation of joy, love, peace, acceptance, contentment, happiness… All we crave we cannot see or touch. Daydreaming fuels within me such expansive joy, love, excitement and eager anticipation while it breathes contentment into my present moments. To no longer dream is to die for me, to live a life of going through the motions, to hit the repeat button eternally.

I tell my children that anything is possible. I encourage them to dream and follow their passions. Sadly the “reality” teachers along their life path have put holes in their Daydreamer kites. The glorious news for them and all of us, is that kites can be mended to fly again.

Thank you Daydreamers for always being curious, for imagining what can be, for stepping forth in the crowd of naysayers to fly your kite…

If you can imagine it, you can achieve it. If you can dream it, you can become it.

William Arthur Ward
Your dream space is for you to fill, to passionately create, curiously explore and infinitely expand…

I am sincerely enjoying the journey with the characters of “Your Soul’s Invitation”, for they are remembering to dream, thanks to an unexpected magazines. Click HERE to read the latest or begin the journey.